The $50 Tummy Ache

I generally like Mondays.  I do.

Starting a fresh, new week.  Flipping that page in the lesson plan book and personal planner. It’s so lovely.

But yesterday? Tried to kill me.  Or at least damage me greatly.

It started out fine.  I was on schedule and everything.

Got up, showered, made a protein shake and a cup of coffee and left for work before 6:45am.  I was even at work in time to make some copies before school started.

First hour we worked on vocab and demonstrative adjectives in Spanish.

Second hour we discussed chapter 6 from The Scarlet Letter.

Third hour, I suddenly had what I can only describe as severe gas pains.  Or at least that is what I thought they were.  They started around 9:45am and got more and more intense as the hour wore on and as I struggled to talk about those pesky demonstrative adjectives again.

At one point I had to leave the room because I thought I might vomit from the pain.  I was right.  Twice.

By the end of the hour, and by the third trip to the bathroom to try to vomit (or pass something out another way), I decided I needed to go home.  There was no way I could teach through this.

So I emailed the secretaries at both schools to let them know I was going home and would need a sub for my 2 hours at the junior high school.

At this point the pain was so bad it felt like when I had my second miscarriage, so I started to get afraid there was something very wrong.  I knew I wasn’t pregnant (or at least I REALLY HOPED I wasn’t), so I didn’t think it could be anything with my reproductive equipment, but with my history, I started getting nervous.

And so I drove home.  It’s a 35-minute commute.  When you feel like you might birth an organ, that is the longest drive EVER.

And of course within a couple miles of my exit, there was construction that backed traffic up to a crawl.  It probably only added about 4 minutes to my drive, but it felt like an hour.  I mean, I had to puke in a cup because the pain was so bad.  I’m pretty sure THOSE workers went home with a story to their families.

At this point my vision started getting blurry and I thought I might pass out…which actually sounded sort of awesome because it would give me temporary relief from the pain.  Of course, I didn’t want to crash my car, so I focused with an intensity that put me on the verge of tears.

I almost hit the lawn mower in our garage with my fast park job.  I actually had to sit on the garage floor because my knees about gave out under me after exiting my car.  I sort of wanted to lay on the cool pavement for awhile, but lucky I had not gone completely insane, and I pulled myself into the house.

I got my jammies on and hit the toilet for some more heaving–because by this time, the protein shake and 2 sips of coffee were long gone from my tummy.

During this time I was texting with Cortney about the fact that my stomach was trying to escape out of me and was ripping and tearing in its efforts.  He decided to take an early lunch (noon) and come check on me.

By this time, all the pain was on the right side.  It wrapped from my lower abdomen all the way to my lower back.  This worried Cort since seven years ago he had the same symptoms for 2 days before he admitted defeat to the ER where they took his appendix with only moments to spare before it burst.

And so we went to the ER.

I heaved in the car.  Cort was not amused.

After Cort got me checked in to the ER, I fell asleep in the waiting room.  When I woke up, I could walk and there was only a bit of cramping left.  The nurse wanted a urine sample due to the fact that it could be a tubal pregnancy, kidney stones, or any number of things.  But she for sure wanted to make sure I wasn’t pregnant.

She did assure us that most appendix cases don’t go from 0 pain to 10 that quickly.

I wasn’t sure if that was good or not since it seemed bad to go from fine to throwing up in less than an hour.

So I peed in a cup.  And suddenly felt completely fine.  Other than exhausted.

The NP gave me an exam and said it could be gas, although it didn’t sound like it since it was all on the right side.  He guessed that if the urine came back not pregnant, it was probably stones.

The urine came back not pregnant (yes, we both fell back with relief.  what?), but there was no blood that would indicate stones either.  He did tell me that 20% of stones are very small and don’t leave blood in the urine,  and since it cleared up after peeing, he would guess that is what happened.

And then he sent me home.  So we paid our $50 co-pay and I carried my no longer needed puke bucket back out to the truck with me.

I’ll admit I felt dumb.

I still feel dumb.

I went  to the ER for “nothing”, cost us $50 we don’t have, and two hours of Cort’s time away from work to take me…unpaid.

All to learn that I should drink a bunch of water and take a nap.

Cort assured me I did the right thing by requesting to go in, and that he would have done the same.

I just couldn’t believe that I was in SO MUCH PAIN hours earlier, and later?  Nothing but exhaustion.

I still feel kind of dumb…and I am crabby that I now have to go to work early today to do the copies and planning I didn’t get to do yesterday.

As someone pointed out on twitter, September has been sort of a doozy for our family.

We could use and easier October.

Until then…we will just put away Monday and try to make Tuesday better.

And less stoney.