The Blog and the Beautiful

Dudes.  As I type this, I am afraid my legs may fall off from all the walking I did at the zoo today.

Good thing I have a Sluiter Nation Recruit here for you today.

Beth Anne of Heir to Blair and I have a weird blogging relationship.

And by weird I mean we read each other’s blogs and pretty much never comment.  Seriously, she has admitted to knowing everything about me and never talking to me.  To which I fell out of my chair laughing because um…SAME!

When we met at BlogHer last year we were all awkward and “hey, it’s you.  It’s YOU!” (Ok, maybe that was just me.  She was all tall and pretty with her pretty hair. And her sweet Southern Smile.  Oh did I mention I have a crush on Southern Bloggers?  I’m looking at you, Miranda).

Anywhoodles…we met over our PPD.

I stalked her for quite some time after that.

I totally loved her blog and her straight up writing style and her no apologies swagger.

So I kept reading.

But I just sort of hung back in my reader.

I’m not really sure why.  I still don’t know why I don’t comment.

But her life makes me happy.  Seeing her with her adorable son (yeah, blondie like Eddie) and hubs knowing what she went through to get there?  Happy heart.

So I am pretty excited that she is here today to talk about something that has been in my head since meeting bloggers in real life and after writing my post from Monday.


There’s a rub with blogging where everyone belongs & nobody feels that they belong. Where there’s an unobtainable “cool kids club” that is seemingly defined by stats & who follows who on Twitter & who you room with at BlogHer. Where life is splashed across the pages of the internet with highlight reels & pin-worthy parties & that nagging feeling in my belly that tells me I might not ever be good enough. Blogs can feel like fashion shows of life, for the gorgeous homes & the beautiful mommas & the latest hair style that I will never, ever master with a flat iron because I simply failed Girl 101.

In the realm of the “mommy blogging,” I am surrounded by hot moms. They get pregnant & don’t swell & carry a perfectly round basketball over flowing tops they purchase at Forever 21. When I get pregnant, I’m in maternity pants at 5 weeks, my rings are off by 15 weeks, & even my nose gets knocked up. The entire process is very, very unfortunate for my self esteem. But the other blogging mommas stay rail thin with gorgeous locks, who maintain their sense of style & don’t go to work with oatmeal smeared on their crotch like I have so many times. (Far too many times to count & that’s one over the limit for basic dignity.) These moms spill across my Pinterest feed with gorgeous outfits & holding toddlers on their hip in 3-inch heels.

When I hold my toddler on my hip in 3-inch heels, I’m a) lucky not to fall over & b) paying for it that evening with aching hips.

I wonder where they find the time to be so polished. Where they find the motivation to get back into a bikini. How they know that those stripes would look that wonderful with wedges & a grey shirt. What lipstick they’re wearing because dang, it’s pretty!

I doubt I will ever be a hot mom. I’ll probably always carry a spare tire around my hips & have stinky postpartum feet & never know what to do with my hair. I’ll probably always grab Old Navy button-downs because I’m too afraid of the hot pink blouse that ties at the neck like a 1960’s Mad Men secretary. Maybe it’s because I sit with a book instead of training for a 5K & that I’ve never had much interest in make-up other than covering up the dark circles under my eyes.

But I wish I were different on a petty, insecure level.


Right in my heart parts, this post.

Because yeah, I wish I was all hip and hot and “Stacy’s Eddie’s Mom Has Got it Going On” too.

Also?  BA?  If you choose to add to your family by way of your uterus again?  I’ll send you the pics of me during both pregnancies and you will feel AMAZINGLY HOT!

You’re welcome.

People?  Don’t just sit there, go read more of Beth Anne’s words on her own blog.

And then go enter my Big Brica Blowout Giveaway!

About Katie

Just a small town girl...wait no. That is a Journey song. Katie Sluiter is a small town girl, but she is far from living in a lonely world. She is a middle school English teacher, writer, mother, and wife. Life has thrown her a fair share of challenges, but her belief is that writing through them makes her stronger.


  1. Okay, 3 things:

    1) You, meaning BA & Katie, are in the cool crowd when it comes to the whole mommy-blogging existence. &
    2) I feel like I could’ve written much of this post myself. I got almost choked up in a weird, embarrassing way, feeling like my secrets were outed or something.
    3) Bottom line, I love you both & follow you both religiously. When I first joined the PPD group (you know the one) and found about you two, I would get you confused–mistaking one for the other and vice versa. LoL

  2. I just want to say, yes, amen, and hear, hear Beth Anne!

  3. I got choked up too. Usually I’m so secure in myself but I get in these terrible moods where I start comparing and doing stupid things like feeling bad for my husband for looking the same as in college when I’ve wrecked myself with kids. Logically I see the ridiculousness, but some days…

  4. Thank you for having me, sweet friend! I am so honored that you asked.

    Thank you for not creeping out at how much I know about you!

  5. SAME AS THE BOTH OF YOU. SAME SAME SAME. I do not feel cool. I do not feel cute. I feel like a big ol’ loser with flabby skin, stretch marks and Samsonite under my eyes.

    And you know I totally dig your Michigan accent and hot booty, right? I wish I could describe the shape of my state as something cool like a glove instead of a sweaty, Republican armpit

  6. Yeah, the whole Cool Crowd thing makes me a bit itchy. I have been trying to stop worrying about if I am In or Out and comment more on blogs that I love – like yours! I am also a big fan of Heir to Blair – you both kick serious ass. And, hey, I am lucky if I get to shower alone, use the bathroom without having to explain what’s happening, or wear anything that doesn’t have paint/marker/glitter all over it! Being a mom is messy.

  7. Oh you two are too sweet. This blogging thing is a TRIP. I sit here thinking “as if anyone would ever love ME like they love Katie or BA” or “I wish I could X Y or Z like them or her or that mom over there”. It doesn’t matter who or what we are does it, we always insist on comparing? And I never ever contemplate the possibility that anyone could ever think such things about me. It’s sad when you think about it.

    And for the record, people only post the best photos of themselves, and then filter them to death. And if I managed to hold my kid, if even for a minute, in my 3-inch heels, you better believe I’d take a photo then plaster it all over the internet like this is the norm. While I can and do mother in my heels, I’d be lying if I didn’t admit that I’m secretly screaming on the inside, regardless of the smile I may wear. Ah perceptions, they are so blurry sometimes.

  8. I gave up all hope of being in the Cool Kids Club. I wish I had the time to devote to things like that. To my kids, to my appearance, to my house, to my blog. But Momma’s holdin’ down the 8-5 and tries to soak up every last minute with her kids in the evenings, so I’m lucky if I get an entry started in the evenings to publish the next morning. And let’s not even talk about my house or my clothes. Let’s not even go there.

  9. I was nodding to every. single. word! I always say that I’m a Fashion-NOT-sta or that I missed the fashion courses in college because I simply can’t put an outfit together to save my life! Don’t get me wrong, I put clothes on…but nothing that looks the least bit hip, fun, or cute! AMEN to this post!!

  10. Yeah, this got me and I can so see it. I feel the same… and I haven’t worn three inch heels in ages. 🙂

  11. This got me too… there’s a bunch of choked up Mommas in here!!!

  12. Jennifer says

    Hit the nail on the head. I feel like this almost daily, and definitely at least once weekly when I debate whether or not to go to playgroup with all my perfect-mommy-friends. :/ Awesome post.

  13. You both make me happy to read, even though I don’t comment nearly enough at either of your blogs 🙂

    And BA? I am 5’1″, with a very short waist. When I’m pregnant, I pop before I can even pee on the stick. Sigh.


  1. […] I was invited by Katie of Sluiter Nation to write as a recruit.  So I talked about not belonging to the Hot Mom Club.  Thanks, […]