so you’re going to BlogHer…or not.

I went to this big blogging conference last year–you  may have heard of it?  It’s called BlogHer and it’s kind of a big deal.

Anywho, I went while I was in my first trimester of pregnancy with Charlie. I flew across the country, by myself, while popping zofran and tums like candy, on lots of medication to help me feel ok.

I still barfed during sessions.  I still needed to go back to my room every afternoon for a pregnant nap.  I still left all the parties by 11pm so I wouldn’t turn into a pumpkin could get some sleep for me and Charlie.

And I came back with a wicked case of antenatal depression.


I really did.  I met some of the most fantastic women; I solidified friendships; I hugged one of my best friends for the first time; and I was recognized by someone whom I was pretty sure had no idea I existed. Plus? San Diego is gorgeous.


I am not going this year.  Lots of reasons.  Not the point of this post.

I will be going next year.  I’ve already decided (please, BlogHer Goddesses, let it be more centrally located in the country for this midwestern bumpkin).

When I do go again, these are the things I think I will do differently…

>>>I will NOT stress out about what to wear.  Seriously.  Last year I think I wrote three posts panicking about clothes.  CLOTHES.  My BlogHer vet friends told me not to worry.  They told me over and over.  I worried.  Needlessly.  Most of the stuff I painstakingly picked out?  I never wore.  At the time I blamed pregnancy, but let’s be honest.  That is not how I roll in real life.  I put something on in the morning and willmaybe change up part of it to go out at night.  Not do a complete overhaul.  Also? NO ONE CARES.

>>>I will NOT bring 87 pairs of shoes.  I wore two.  TWO pairs.  flip-flops by day and ONE of the nights I wore a cute pair of red mary jane pumps I had.  Again, I was pregnant.  But I wasn’t THAT pregnant.  I’m a teacher.  I am used to being on my feet, but I also wear comfy shoes.

>>>I will NOT try to do ALL THE THINGS.  It’s not possible.  Well, maybe it is, but you go home with jet lag and antenatal depression and no desire to blog ever again.  I tried to go to sessions and speakers and the expo and all the parties I could possibly attend.  Man, I want to go to bed just reading that.  Next time I will maybe go to some sessions.  Or maybe I will just get an expo pass.  Or maybe even just a party pass.  Quality over quantity is a true statement.

>>>I will NOT care about parties.  I really didn’t care last year, but I rsvp-ed and went to them all because the crowd I was with went to them all.  I ended up underwhelmed at most of them.  I am sure part of it was my lack of drinking, but I am not a HUGE drinker, so I can’t really blame that.  I just think some of it is over-hyped.  Like prom.  Remember how you wait your whole life for prom and then you go…”meh. I guess it was fun.”  Yeah. That.  Don’t get me wrong, a few of the parties were off-the-chain-ALL CAPS-awesome, but that was mostly due to WHO was there, not WHAT was there.

>>>I will NOT worry about my impression.  I know last year there were people who were let down after meeting me.  But they didn’t know I had maybe just barfed, or just woken up from a nap, or was on my way to a nap, or was on a mission for water, or was amazed they knew me, or was still shell-shocked by the sheer number of people I knew, but didn’t know…but KNEW!  I know I came off as aloof, snobby, whatever to some people.  I am bad at showing emotion.  It’s why I talk to people IN MY COMPUTER.

>>>I will NOT just stare at someone I love, but go talk to them.  I wish I had gone up and said hi to so many people who I saw from afar.  So silly to not do it.

>>> I will NOT be a swaghole. Of all the free stuff I was giving/took, I left about 30% of it behind.  Of the stuff that came home with me (smashed in its own suitcase that I had to check/pay for), I probably only kept/used 10%. I gave another 10% of it away as gifts, and I chucked or donated the other 80%. I’m  a language teacher, and even I know that I played that game wrong.  No one needs 43573987 tubes of lip balm.

>>> I WILL make time to just sit and chat.  The best…and I mean HANDS DOWN THE BEST part of going to BlogHer was meeting IN REAL LIFE people I have been pouring my soul to in this space, whom I have been whining and venting to on twitter, whose words I read faithfully over my cup of coffee in the morning or my glass of wine in the evening.

Did you make it this far down my list?  You did?  AWESOME.

Want more tips?  I’m over at Daddy Runs A Lot today (the fool let me roam his place alone…unsupervised…oh the amok I will run…) giving him some tips too because he is going to BlogHer!

I figured that poor soul has visions of hot moms having pillow fights in his head and what he is in for is very, very…NOT THAT.

So follow me to his place for a big party…I mean…tips for Dad Bloggers at a Mom Blogger conference.  Weee!


Also, don’t forget that I am doing a super awesomely rad giveaway with Papersalt over here.