Saturday Charlie came into our room while I was in there, and wandered over to my bedside table and this conversation happened:
Charlie: Mom Mom? What is in that circle box?
Me: Two little hearts.
Charlie: Why, Mom Mom?
Me: Because they are for two babies.
Charlie: What two babies?
Me: Two babies that were in my tummy, but died.
Charlie: What were theirs names?
Me: They didn’t have names. They died before we knew if they were boys or girls. They were very tiny in my tummy when they died.
Charlie: Well….they are somewhere.
Me: Yup. They are. Maybe in heaven with Papa?
Charlie: Yeah. Mom, Mom? Why do you have three pictures of Alice?
Me: Those are not all Alice. That one is. But that one right there is Eddie, and that one there is you.
Charlie: We are alls sleepin’.
Me: Yup. All five babies. Sleeping.
Charlie: I like babies, Mom Mom.
Me: Yup. Me too.
Sometimes the most important conversations happen when you least expect them to. Cortney and I have always made it a policy to always answer our children’s questions in the most age-appropriate, honest way possible. When we brought up this conversation with Eddie, he first reacted in a way that was almost a little funny to me.
Eddie: WHAT? YOU TOLD ME I WAS FIRST!!! HOW DID YOU NEVER TELL ME THERE WERE TWO BABIES BEFORE ME! I NEVER KNEW THIS UNTIL RIGHT NOW!!
He is a little dramatic.
But when I explained to him that he was the first to be born, and that he is a miracle, and that once he was born, we knew what we had to do to have healthy babies–his brother and sister–he was happy again.
Being oldest is important to him.
As it should be.