being forward

We had had the conversation, but had not acted on anything since it had been left sort of open to interpretation.

We went on as we normally did: he came over a few times a week for pizza and beers and hanging out. Β Sometimes we sat outside, sometimes we watched TV, sometimes we sat at my kitchen table.

One night we were sitting next to each other on my couch watching TV. I don’t know what we were watching or even when it happened. That whole summer was a blur. What I know is that at some point his hand found mine.

Fingers intertwined. His thumb softly rubbing my my thumb.

There was none of the awkwardness that comes with holding hands for the first time.

No sweaty palms.

None of that thing when both of you are afraid to move so your hands just sit there, losing blood flow to your finger tips.

If someone had to shift, she/he shifted.

Fingers tightened around the new hand and released.

If someone left to get a drink or go to the bathroom, without a word our hands re-found each other upon return.

No one spoke about this new action in our relationship. No one had to.

And then…the weight of my day and my feelings and all that was going on fell on me and I drifted off to sleep on his shoulder.

He continued to hold my hand.

And gently glide his thumb over mine.

I don’t remember him leaving that night, but I know he did. He had to work early the next day.

When I finally got up in the morning and logged into my email, there was one from him…just like every day.

“I’m sorry if I was too forward last night. Please forgive me.”

All he had done was hold my hand, but he was concerned he had taken advantage of the situation and of me.

That is the moment I fell for him.

Cortney still holds my hand almost daily. If it’s not while we sit on the couch or while we are walking somewhere, it’s as we fall asleep at night.

His thumb still lightly rubbing mine.

on our honeymoon...where he held my hand a LOT.

on our honeymoon…where he held my hand a LOT.

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About Katie

Just a small town girl...wait no. That is a Journey song. Katie Sluiter is a small town girl, but she is far from living in a lonely world. She is a middle school English teacher, writer, mother, and wife. Life has thrown her a fair share of challenges, but her belief is that writing through them makes her stronger.

Comments

  1. That is SO sweet. How many years have you been together? My hubby and I just celebrated our 8th wedding anniversary.

    • We have been married 8 years too! Our anniversary was in June. But we have known each other for…gosh…almost 20 years!

  2. I feel like by the retelling of your story, you may just, maybe, falling in love again. Right? I hope so. Because. #HandHoldingIsAwesome #NiceTee

    • Yes, I fall in love all over again with Cortney lots. These stories are just one way. And that Tshirt? was right after Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes got together. We thought it was funny that just as we were getting married there were “Free Katie!” Ts! Ha!

  3. awww…adorable! I was always a sucker for a little hand holding!

  4. Aww how sweet that he thought he had been too forward.. Good guys like that.. rare darling..

  5. How sweet! What a great way to fall in love.

    I love the pic of you two together on your honeymoon.

    • Thank you! It was less than a month later that we know we would be together for ever. Sigh. I love remembering this stuff.

  6. So sweet – aren’t love stories’ beginnings the best? Holding hands is so simple, but it means so much sometimes.

    • I hope he never stops reaching for my hand. If we are walking just the two of us he ALWAYS reaches for my hand and even after all these years, it still makes my heart do that pitter patter thing πŸ™‚

  7. Loooooove this. πŸ™‚

  8. That is just too, too sweet. Gah. My teeth hurt. Love it!

  9. So beautiful. I love the thumb circles when hand holding…So comforting. Kind of tells you he loves you without ever saying the words. Lovely post! And yes, that T-shirt is awesome πŸ˜‰

  10. That is so sweet. I hope, he’ll always hold your hand!!!

  11. aww

  12. Oh, this gives me the butterflies, Katie. I LOVE this story. Knowing that exact moment of falling in love is so special. Cort sounds like a true gentleman. Three cheers for handholding and love!

  13. That is incredibly sweet.

  14. Shit, I think I just fell for your husband. This is gonna be so awkward.

    Also, I am totally making me a FREE ARNEBYA shirt. Watch me.

  15. Now THIS is a love story. πŸ™‚

    Love the shirt, too.