My Bloggy Turn-Ons (and Turn-Offs)

I’ve been doing this blog thing for awhile.

My four-year blogoversary is allegedly coming up this summer.

And admittedly, after pounding these keys for that long, I should know more about this blogging stuff.

But I really don’t.

In fact, it’s almost embarrassing how little I know about the blogging world after four years.

Apparently, though, I have some of you completely snowed into thinking I know a thing or two about this thing called blogging.

What I have come to find is that I troll for blogs the same way I used to hunt for a mate.

Stay with me here.

When I used to check out guys, there were some first impressions that were made.  It’s the same way when I click over to a blog for the first time.  I’m checking it out, trying to see if it would be a place I would like to frequent.

And so…my turn-on’s and turn-off’s…

Turn On: A blog with a clean look.  I have always liked my dudes well-kept and I am the same way about blogs that I check out.   Being well-groomed and tidy just feels…comfortable.

Turn Off: Flashing ads, jumble pile of buttons and badges, google ad sense ads, crazy background designs, dancing pandas…wait…what was I talking about?  Oh yeah, I don’t like to be overstimulated.  I am at your blog for your content.  Too much “stuff” is like too much jewelry…it just looks clunky and like you’re trying to hard.

Turn On: Easy to find about page, contact info, ways to follow (email subscribe, rss feed, twitter account, facebook fanpage, etc).  I do a LOT of clicking over from other places.  If I like what I’m reading?  I want to know about you and possibly follow you.  Make it easy on me because I am lazy or I won’t be back.

Turn Off: When I can’t find your name…or even your pen name.  I can’t tell you how many “about” pages I have read that are in the first person, but never give a name.  They will even go so far as to give an email address.  But I won’t email you…because I don’t know your NAME.  It’s like dating.  If you’re going to give your digits?  Let me know who I am supposedly calling.

Turn On: Threaded comments.  WordPress does this automatically.  I love when I can reply to another commenter AND the author can reply to comments this way.  It’s an instant conversation and I LOVE a great conversation.

Turn Off: Using disquis for your threaded comments.  For whatever reason diquis hates me and won’t load half the time so I can’t comment.  It’s hard to have a conversation when I can’t get through.

Turn On: Great content.  You can’t just be a pretty blog and say nothing.  I will not stay, I say.

Turn Off: word verification.  wordpress and blogger both have ways to “catch” spam now.  No one needs word verification.  Unless you are trying to discourage comments.

Turn On: Being available and real.  If you let me know that you know that I visited your place?  I get all happy.  It could be a reply to my comment, an email, or just a shout out on twitter.  Spreading love you receive is the best way to make me want to come back for more.

Turn Off: the cold shoulder.  There are blogs I simply don’t read any more because the blogger NEVER talked to me .  Not in comments, not on my blog, not in email, not on twitter(this goes for BIG HUGE bloggers as well.  Some actually chat with their followers, others?  not so much) .  If you ignore my existence?  I will cease to exist on your blog.  It doesn’t mean you need to kiss my butt every time I visit; just acknowledging that I am a reader of yours by engaging with me on twitter will make me like you that much more.

Long story short? You have to be attractive AND have something to say.

You have to be clean and fresh AND hold a conversation.

Otherwise your blog is just another cute butt in a pair of Levis.

Do you enjoy these posts about blogging?  Do you want more tips?  Let me know; I’ve blogged on blogger and wordpress.  I know a couple things.  And my mama taught me to share.
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About Katie

Just a small town girl...wait no. That is a Journey song. Katie Sluiter is a small town girl, but she is far from living in a lonely world. She is a middle school English teacher, writer, mother, and wife. Life has thrown her a fair share of challenges, but her belief is that writing through them makes her stronger.

Comments

  1. ooh fun! agree on all of this, but am currently in process of switching to WP because Blogger makes me NUTS about responding to commenters. So difficult!!

    • agree. it was one of my fave parts of switching to wp. i’ll do a follow up next weekend on plug-ins for wp and some blogger tips too 🙂

  2. Hi, Great post! I found it on twitter because there were a bunch of ladies over there saying they unfollow tweeters who ONLY post their blog posts without ever having any conversations. LOL! That’s funny to me because I was thinking about having a twitter account just for my blog updates and one just for me, but now I’ll rethink that one.

    I just started blogging and I LOVE your tips. I feel the same way about everything you’ve said. I want a conversation, I want community, and I WISH I knew how to have a great comment section, but I don’t.

    BTW: Don’t hate me because my blog is under a redesign, it’s a mess. LOL!

    Thanks! Cathy

    • it’s ok to be under redesign! i’ve been through that a few times too!

      Next weekend I will do some more specific tips…my favorite plug-ins for wp, tricks for blogger, etc.

  3. Kirsten, Just saw your post…so if you switch over to wordpress do you loose all your stats? Like pageviews and stuff?

  4. Oh, I loved this Katie! This is so true. I don’t like snobby bloggers either. It makes me feel like I’m in high school all over again *winces with pain*

    • right? your readers are the ones who “make” you. be nice to us or we will revolt! 🙂

      • Okay, now I feel less insecure about feeling this way! I thought there was something wrong with me that I found it odd that the owner of a blog I was reading and commenting on for over a year *never* responded to my questions/statements, etc. but would get into it with certain people. Oh well, I’ll find someplace that doesn’t remind me of high school.

        First time here–like the site. Four years! Wow. That’s stamina!

  5. all are great tips!!! i agree with the “converse with me” thing. I know, as a busy working mom, it’s hard to visit my commenters every day, but i do visit. AND email back, so please have your email address readily available!!

    i don’t have threaded comments. mostly b/c disqus hates me too, so i don’t want it on my blog.

    • I am not good at always responding to comment either, but I try when I have time. I am better about it when I am on break from school 🙂

  6. I so agree! Especially about the not talking back. I unfollow big people who think they’re too busy to engage in their comments or on Twitter. I don’t demand that they treat me like I’m special, but one particular person won’t even answer direct questions on Twitter. That is insulting. Also, I’m never sure which side of the gaudy line my blog falls on. I see all these other blogs with clean lines and simple designs, but I’m drawn to a brighter theme. I still like to keep it readable, though. I dunno. It’s 11 p.m. I’m rambling. ;0)

    • I love that I can reply to someone instead of just posting another comment that gets lost in space….

      Anyway, Cindy – your blog isn’t gaudy! I love it. Your header rocks, it’s very clean. 🙂

    • i agree. i don’t expect people to respond to EVERY comment I leave, but an acknowledgment of my existence if I talk to you on twitter is nice.

  7. Great tips for those of us starting out. Thank you!

  8. New to blogging… Love these hints! Thanks!

  9. Note to self, stop eating Easter candy else butt will not look good in Levi’s!

  10. Levi’s? Have you been reading Miranda’s jean post??

    I hate that I don’t have threaded comments. And I’m on blogger, so it doesn’t happen automatically, of course. If you don’t like disquis, do you have another suggestion for those of us who are clueless about all things bloggy?

  11. I hardly ever reply to comments. I appreciate them a lot, but never thought they had to be acknowledged – unless it was my mom or dad!

    Lots to think about.

    • people like it. I can’t do it all the time, and I notice that it doesn’t really matter if I do or not as far as my blog numbers, but it’s a fun way to interact.

  12. TheNextMartha says

    I don’t have a cute ass but I think I adhere to most of these. Holy crap you’ve been doing this for 4 years? I forget to comment on my comments. I should do that. Thanks for coming to my blog. I like you. I bet you have a cute ass in Levis.

    • yes, my blog looks so young for it’s age, doesn’t it?

      And next time I am at your blog–you know, in 3 months when you post again–I will be sure to wear my Levis.

  13. Well, thank goodness I’m most of the way to turning you on.

    Wait, what?

  14. Love it lady! And all so very true! I adore clean and cozy, too! XO

    • me too! if I could add a cup of coffee and a yummy smelling scenty sent to my blog for my readers? I so would.

  15. How apt that I should be reading this now! Have just spent the last 2 hours tweaking my blog. I think WordPress can probably offer me a cleaner look but I can’t figure it out, so Blogger it is. Disqus is easy so any other alternatives that is friendly to all, pray tell. I use it as I want to comment on comments, I think it’s just good manners to at least acknowledge that someone took the time to read your post and write something down.

    Agree with the word verification business, very annoying!

    P/s* Love your blog Katie!

    • oh thank you, Allison!

      WordPress is super easy, but you have to use self-hosted in my opinion to really love it. As far as free goes? Blogger is still better.

      I think Intense Debate is better than Disquis if you want threaded comments on blogger.

      next week I will have some more blogger tricks I learned in my 3 years there and my fave wp plug-ins since I switched.

  16. Are we the same person? I think so!

  17. I’m with Jenn – i want to know what programs folks like for comments if not using Disqus. That’s what we have, and I have trouble getting it to load, too.

    I am still trying to figure out the whole badge thing. We’re a newer blog, so it’d be great to get listed with folks, but good LORD I am a simple girl. I don’t wear much bling and I certainly don’t need to sell my soul for every badge under the sun. What’s a gal to do?

    • intense debate is better, in my opinion, than disquis.

      next week? I’ll have some fun tips and some blog bling guidelines I try to stick to.

  18. I love this post. I love reading blog posts about blogging hehe. I hate when I click on a blog and am overwhelmed with reviews and giveaways and no actual writing.

  19. Awesome post, Katie! I have to say, I installed the Intense Debate commenting system on my Blogger blog, because I hated not being able to reply to comments and create comment threaded conversations. And now I find that sometimes I have the time and energy to reply and sometimes I don’t. But I hope that as a special needs (autism) parent, folks will understand that and forgive me if they comment on one of my “off” days. Because if it comes down to having the time/energy to work & play with my autistic son (& his twin) or to reply to comments on my blog, you know which has to win out.

    • I really like Intense Debate better than Disquis for blogger. and you know what? I am with you. Sometimes I have time to respond to comments and sometimes not. Eddie comes first. I’d rather play with him than respond to comments. If that loses me followers? Oh well!

  20. I loved reading this!! Very well written and great points!!! 🙂

    ~JB

  21. I haven’t been around in the blogging world nearly as long as you have but I agree with everything you listed here. Especially the last one. If I comment and comment yet the person never talks back to me in any way I stop reading and commenting.

  22. I love your bloggy turn-ons!! It’s vital to have conversations with people, otherwise I sound like a narcissistic twat, you know? It’s not just about me sometimes. Saying “hey! Great post on twitter about x, y, or z” takes two seconds.

    I do with google, ruler of Internet, could come up with a way for us to comment on blogs directly from the reader. That’d be awesome.

    • Bee. Tee. Dubs.

      I typed this earlier comment through a haze while trying to will my child to go back to sleep. So the “Hey! Great post on twitter about x, y, or z” makes me sound like a moron who doesn’t understand words.

      I just needed to come back and clarify that what I MEANT was sending out a tweet to the author and saying “Great post about x, y, or z” ON TWITTER takes two seconds.

      Send coffee.

      • OMG all I can say is that I love you. I love that you clarify your comments! And? You used the word “twat” in my comments. You twat bombed my comments.

    • Miranda – I couldn’t agree with you more on the commenting from a reader. That is the exact reason I don’t use a reader/do RSS/subscribe – I just go to the actual sites each day b/c I hate that you can’t comment from there.

      • I have over 150 blogs in my reader (not all of which I comment on regularly) so going to each one would take me DECADES. I love Reader, but I wish it was more comment-friendly.

    • You can actually install a button in your bookmarks toolbar that will allow you to flip through the actual blog posts on the actual blog site and therefore be able to comment when you want to without having to go to the blog and then back to the reader. (Assuming you use google reader here) At the bottom of your left hand column/dashboard is your subscriptions list. At the bottom of that in tiny letters is Manage Subscriptions, click on that. You will be in your settings, and one of the menu options is Goodies. Click on that. The second goody they list on this page is called Put Reader in a Bookmark. There is a orange button called Next that they tell you to click on, drag and drop where wanted into your bookmarks toolbar (in Firefox this is the area right under the address bar). Now once you are signed into your reader you just click the Next button that is in the bookmarks toolbar and it will take you directly to the blog post that is first in the list. The actual post, so you can comment and everything. Now if you have blogs you are interested in reading first (I have favourites I read every day) then what you have to do is create a folder system for your subscriptions and you can create a Next tab just for that folder. And if all you want to do is read just those ones you use that Next button. I hope this made sense (and is actually what you were wishing for in your comment :). If you have questions about this let me know. I love this because allows me to use my reader and takes the hassle out of commenting at the same time!

  23. You made some good points! I think having a conversation is so vital – part of why I’m doing this is to be part of a community of moms. I’m so frustrated b/c I’m on wp.com and I reply to all comments but I just found out the other day that people don’t get email notifications of it & who goes back to check? Very frustrating. Switching to .org asap! My design is horrendous but working on that too. Guess it’s all a work in progress as a newbie!

    • oh man…yeah, .com is poopy. Next week? tips for how to switch (without it being scary), plug-in’s for .org and some tricks I learned for .com and Blogger.

  24. I want to stab blogs with word verification. I really would like my blog looking mahvelous and clean but I am doing it solo so…it’s a work in progress.
    But amen to all of the above.
    And I will shamefully admit to having google adsense…I need to pay for my coffee habit 😉 Don’t hate.

    • I agree.. hate hate hate (did I say hate?) word verification… drives me insane.

      • and yes, word verification kills puppies. and unicorns. and quite possibly makes baby jesus cry.

    • meh, your google ad sense isn’t obnoxious. some people? put it in annoying places.

      also? does it work? do you get money from it? I always thought it didn’t work.

  25. Blog genius or not, I do appreciate hearing the likes and dislikes of bloggers I like. 🙂 I have the same relationship with Disqus. Hates me! But I do like threaded comments. I use blogger, so I don’t have that ability, I don’t think, but I do like when I’m able to keep up convo with people that way. Anyway, thank you for sharing. I’m heading to my About Me now to make sure my name it included. 🙂

    • on blogger you can install intense debate. it will do threaded comments for you and is MUCH nicer than disquis IMO.

      And thank you! Next week I will do some How TO stuff 🙂

  26. This is so great! Good to hear these from a blogging “veteran”. 😉 I’m such a newbie but I totally agree on the word verification. A clean site is SO much easier to read and enjoy. Streamline. I wanna see what’s important. Thank you Kate.

  27. I feel pretty strongly about the last one. I get being busy. I can’t respond to everything and sometimes I THINK that I’ve responded and I didn’t. But never responding? LAME. Or worse? Only responding to negative comments. WTH is that!?!?!

    PS. I hate Disqus as well. I am SO HAPPY that I don’t use it on my blog anymore.

    • yeah, I don’t respond to EVERYTHING either. Totally impossible. But I like to be ABLE to. And I like to do it when I can.

      And Disquis is shit. Intense Debate is better, but WordPress is best 🙂

  28. Hi Katie. First of all, I love it when you visit my blog. Just wanted to get that in there in case you didn’t know. I don’t see you over there often, so I must be doing one of those things above, but I don’t think so. I’m guessing you’re just busy and my content doesn’t always fit with your reading needs. I feel that way with some blogs. I love the bloggers and what they are trying to do, but I don’t always want to read their ever offering. Conversely, I must must must read some people’s blogs every single time. And why? They stimulate my brain, make me laugh, make me feel something, educate and entertain me. Tall orders for any writer, but that’s why we’re here, right?
    Good post, and I concur with your list.

    • Oh Theresa…I think I am over at your blog more than you know. I am not good at commenting every time.

      And thank you for liking my list. I like to talk about blogging once in awhile.

  29. Great tips! I’ve considered using another commenting system. It’s on my long list of things to tweak on my blogs. Now if I can find the time, I can do it.

  30. Tell me we’re still friends even though I SUCK at twitter. Really, I should call it “the twitter” because that’s how lame I am!!

  31. One of my blog turn offs? When people post random photos from random internet sources and then like a “blurb” of crap that really doesn’t tell me anything about them nor have anything to do with the photo. And they do it on a more than once a week basis.

  32. I have been blogging for 3 years and I am sooooo dense! I have no idea what I’m doing. I may need to pick your brain on some of these…especially replying to comments. I want to be able to reply to people’s comments on my blog, but I have no idea how. Maybe you can coach me 🙂

    • I would love to!

      If you are on wp, you have it automatically.

      If you are on blogger, you can install Intense Debate.

      I’ll post some How To’s next week!

  33. I love this comment thread! Now I’m checking out intense debate for blogger comment form…have to figure that out. But one question: How to encourage people to check that little, hard to see link that says “subscribe to comments”? Maybe intense debate has that problem solved? Will go look now.

  34. I have to also say that this is the absolute first comment thread that I’ve actually been interested in reading all the way through…of course I’ve only been on here (blogging and reading blogs) for about a month or so..but anyway.. very nice to have something worth reading. 🙂 BTW: Happy Easter everyone!

  35. I just installed intense debate and it rocks! Did a test post and am having a very pleasant conversation with myself. This comment form looks so nice and professional. Awesome! Hi Katie, I thought I was the only one on here on Easter Eve. LOL

  36. I read posts like this, and they make me want to switch to wordpress, but I am so intimidated. I feel like I can barely figure out my way around blogger 🙁

  37. Can I just shout AMEN from the rooftops? This is so on point and exactly what I have been wanting to say for quite some time now!

  38. There’s a lot to be said for a cute butt in a pair of Levi’s…

    I’ve heard that I take “clean” to the extreme and that my blog is plain. Duh! That was my intention! Pretty sure my blog is the only one in the world that was modeled on those old-fashioned generic soup cans.

    • I like your blog. But I like plain. My blog hurts my head sometimes. I want it to be more cleaned up.

  39. I can’t believe you wrote this whole post and never mentioned music on blogs.

    music on blogs is the devil. And so 2006.

  40. This? Rocks! I’m with you on every single point.

    I need to migrate to WordPress.

    • YES! and if you DO migrate to WP? I have JUST the guy to help you. I’ll be talking about him on Saturday 🙂

  41. Oh my goodness, thank you so much, I am so glad I happened upon this post! Blogger’s lack of threaded comments has driven me insane since day one!!

    I’m installing Intense Debate at this very moment.

    And yes, yay for clean design!! And if you happen to have a moment, how do you feel about light text on a darker background? (Looking for constructive criticism.) I’ve tweaked the “white” of my text so that it doesn’t vibrate against the background as much. I like dark backgrounds for pictures, but if it bugs people, I may re-think my blog design.

    • i personally can’t read white on dark. it hurts my eyes. I’ve heard the same from others. I feel like if you are putting up very little text, and mostly pictures it’s ok, but to read paragraphs of light on dark is just hard…at least for me.

  42. Yeah. You’re totally right with all of this. I’ve spent a lot of time worrying about if I’m a good blogger or not.

    And I guess I’m just doing the best I can. That’s all I can do.

    And take notes from people like you, who do it well.

  43. As soon as I read the “easy to find name” I scooted my butt to my page to make sure my name was listed there. And it was right next to the pub date of the post. But just to make sure people know who I am (and I wanted credit for my awesome writing. duh) I’m going to add it to my About Me page.

    • it’s nice to have it on the About page because sometimes people just put a penname or their blog name next to each post. It’s just more reassuring for me that yes, that is the author. If that makes sense.

      And? You want credit for your awesome writing! 🙂

  44. I could have written this! I am so tired of word verifications and big bloggers who never bother to come over and say hello…despite me leaving them comments for the better part of a year!

    I admire your honesty.

    • it’s true. I am not very good at visiting all the blogs I would like to, but I at LEAST try to respond to comments here from time to time, chat on twitter, and read posts if someone specifically asks me too. It’s impossible to do it all, but I feel strongly that my readers are my community and I am so thankful for them!

  45. Agreed on all points, especially the Disqus thing. Can I also add a turn-off? Not allowing “name/URL” comments? Nothing more frustrating than writing this looooong comment on someone’s blog only to find that without a specific account I can’t leave it? Blergh.

    Off to review my blog for all of the above now!!

    • Oh I TOTALLY agree with your turn-off! That seems to be a HUGE problem for people with blogger blogs…I don’t know if they even know about it. I don’t like having to use my Google account when I leave comments since I don’t blog at blogger anymore.

    • THIS IS MY BIGGEST PET PEEV!!! (and yes, it annoys me enough to internet yell… :))

  46. Yep… The no first name and using disqus are two of my turn offs as well… Sounds like we have similar taste in blogs AND men 😉

  47. I’m so glad your Mama taught you to share! :> And I agree that the conversation is one of the best parts about bloggging. I don’t want to just talk to myself. If I did, I could do that in the privacy of my home! lol

    What frustrates me about Disqus is the amount of time I spend searching for where to comment on a post I like or have something to say and then it finally hits me that they’re probably using Disqus and I need to load up the individual post in order for the comment section to load. There are a couple of blogs that I frequent, who I now know they use Disqus and I’ll load the indiv. post right away (I prefer to load a whole blog, so I can see more…but, that’s just me) and I do it because I love what they write. But, if they haven’t captured my heart or tickled my funny bone, I’m less likely to come back.

    • YES! Disquis just doesn’t load well. it either doesn’t load at all or takes FOREVER…even when I click the specific post.

      And you’re right, if I don’t LOVE the blogger? And they have Disquis, I probably won’t bother coming back for more.

  48. The one thing that really encourages me to return to a blog: consistent postings. My fave blog posts a new entry every day (group of authors, they take turns, and don’t spend entries trying to sell me stuff). But anyway, on frequency: I’ll settle for every week or M,W,F or anything that’s reliable.

    • Yes…even though working full time makes posting regularly difficult? I know that it’s the best way to keep my readers and turn them into a community. Consistency is key in pretty much EVERYTHING, but especially blogging!

  49. JDaniel4's Mom says

    Great tips! I found this post discussed on Twitter. I am so glad I stopped by.

  50. Disquis is the bane of my existence and I hate “about me” sections that are one paragraph long or just a list of 20 random facts. In order to fall in love I need details! I need to be wooed!

    Great list- I couldn’t agree more!

    • About Me sections TOTALLY should be trying to hook the reader, not give us a dumb list of things we don’t care about. Sigh…wooing, yes. That is what blogging is all about 🙂

  51. This was a great list of tips. I always like hearing how people decide which blogs to read and which ones not to.

    • I do too, actually. This is the first post like this I’ve ever done…after reading lots of other people’s.

      Glad you liked my list 🙂

  52. uh oh. I don’t think my About page says my name…but my blog header does? and i use disqus. oops. but this was after many many consultations w/ bloggy gurus who set up my new blog. so far it’s been working well and I do like the thread of comments, unlike what I had w/ Blogger.

    LOVE THIS! just tweeted it, too!
    😉

    • Um silly you…your entire blog is your name! 🙂

      My deal (and many other people’s deal) with Disquis is that it is VERY slow to load, if it does at all. WP has threaded comments, so an embedded system is pretty much not necessary.

      Yay for liking my list 🙂

  53. I am sitting here shaking my head- HOW IS IT THAT I HAVEN”T “met” YOU YET???!!
    sorry for the all caps there – but seriously- how is this possible?!!
    Adding you to my reader and hunting down your twitter handle pronto.
    (& Amen on disquis – can not stand. At all. Not one bit.It’s like skynet in the comment section.)

    • Well hello, Calliope. Welcome to Sluiter Nation! Yay for finding each other! I followed your fun self back on twitter…now we need to chat it up! 🙂

      And yes, disquis? Devil.

  54. Great tips! Just installed Intense Debate. Thanks!

  55. These are great tips! I agree agree agree!

    I wish that blogger would have threaded comments. The fact that isn’t an option drives me batty (and I hate Disqus too!)…..one day I will make that big move to wordpress and my comments will thread.

    (and congrats on being featured on BlogHer!)

    • you can install intense debate on blogger and get threaded comments! it’s not perfect, but it’s better than not.

      And thank you!!

  56. Seven years of blogging has given me quite a lengthy list of blogging dislikes, but I’ll hone it down here.

    If I visit your blog and find any of the following, I’ll leave immediately and never come back:

    Music, pop-ups, threaded words, more ads than content, anything wiggly, smarminess, pomposity, far too much naiveté for one’s age, bad grammar, poor spelling. . . .

    I might be kind of mean. I don’t care.

    P.S. If there are threaded words, I will probably scream out loud as I click off the page. Talk about an intrusion!

    • oh how I agree with you…on ALL of those.

      And a decade of teaching English has made me hard on those who slaughter the language on their blogs as well.

  57. I’ve only been blogging for a few months, and I love posts like this — I treat them like a checklist for my blog and have made many tweaks and improvements. I am on wp.com and have the comments emailed to me. I reply to the email (to post a reply comment) and also BCC the person who left a comment so they can see my “reply.”

  58. The perfect list! Especially the last Turn Off, because I am pathetically needy and practically live for feedback on my blog and when I leave a comment. It is almost hurtful when someone ignores you, especially when you see them responding to other comments. Boo hoo. My comment was great too!! Sniff sniff. Why won’t you talk to me?!?

    I really need some self esteem.

    At any rate, I am so happy to have found your blog! 🙂 (I have to run and turn off the word verification now…)

    • you are all cute with your neediness! But I mean, WHO ISN’T? We all like to know that our words were read and appreciated, ya know? No, I don’t have time to comment on EVERY comment on EVERY post, but I do try to somehow engage with my readers whether it’s here, at their blog, on twitter, or on my fb fan page.

      And if I had any self-esteem…i would share with you. pinky swear.

  59. WOW… I could not agree with you more on so many of your points. I absolutely can’t stand when it’s so difficult to leave a comment, that I feel exhausted and discouraged. I also can’t stand when I have to “comment anonymously” because there is no name/URL option. I’m a new blogger and while I don’t want to plaster the web with my name, I do want bloggers to know who I am and build a relationship with them. I LOVE commenting on peoples’ blogs and I love getting comments back. It’s what makes the bloggy world go ’round. 🙂 Thanks for sharing your pet peevs tho! As a new blogger, it gives me insight into what I should or shouldn’t do. 🙂 🙂 🙂

    • not being able to leave my name and url are maddening. i have a blogger account, so I can use that, but it doesn’t take people to my current blog, which is annoying.

  60. My fav blogs are those that have an interactive component, let you follow them, and comment back. I try my best to reply to every comment I get on my blog. I feel honoured anytime anyone takes the time to stop, read, and respond to what I have put out into the universe.

    I also hate the auto music. Sorry, but if I click over to your blog and there are tunes playing, I am out…

    • yes! I love the feeling of community on a blog! those are my most fave blogs too! and music is a HUGE turn-off! blech!

  61. I’m just starting to figure out the blogging and commenting ordeal. Your style of listing was really helpful. Overwhelming but helpful. I am thinking of going to WordPress but… did I mention overwhelming?!

    • well, my friend…I am going to be doing a series of these on the weekends I think. I thought just one more, but when I started listing things out? It will be a two, maybe three, part series.

      Get ready!

      And I will go slow. Being overwhelmed? Is just not good!

  62. I am in awe of the conversation you have created! Wow! This has been awesome to read and I am picking up some great suggestions for myself. Thank you and I will keep following this!

    • i am a little in awe of this conversation too! and it just started out as something I wasn’t sure I was qualified to blog about, but I did anyway! Crazy!

      Glad you wandered in to the conversation! Going to post on some tips this weekend 🙂

  63. I meant overwhelmed in a good way! Great about more tips. It’s actually convenient to be able to go to one site, one blogger, one woman (yes, I hear you roaring) for such pertinent advice, especially for nubies. I think I spelled that wrong.

    • i did just roar. and blush.

      i do not feel as awesome as you are all giving me credit for. 🙂

  64. Based on your criteria, I think I’d get an A on my report card! I hope I would, anyway.

    Obviously, I agree with you because those are all the things I like and the things I do on my own blog. When I first installed the add-in for threaded messaging in comments, I was SO happy to have it! I hate word-verification. I like knowing who I’m visiting (name!) and I don’t like over-stimulation.

    Woot! (And hopefully I have the good content thing too – my MOM thinks so!)

    Came over from BlogHer, nice to meet you!

  65. Just cruising around looking for some ideas. I haven’t set mine up yet but I’ve been thinking about it for years. So, I’ll be really, really new. Anyway, appreciated your insights. Thanks for sharing.

  66. Thank you Katie! These are great tips. I’m so glad I found this post through the link on BlogHer! I wish I had comment thread. I think I need to make the switch from Blogger to WordPress…it’s time.

  67. I’m a pretty new blogger and really appreciate this great advice! Definitely has encouraged me to rethink a few things in perfect timing, since I’m changing the face of my site. Thanks for the insight!

    Hollie
    http://www.TableclothAdventures.com

  68. Can we talk about music? Drives.Me.Crazy. Like, stabby crazy.
    Great tips. I’m with you on every single one. I feel stupid responding to every single comment, but I like to think I converse well on Twitter.

  69. OK, I HAD to comment on this great piece. Recently two very popular mom bloggers have written about how they are “too busy” to read other people’s blogs like they used to. Really? What if their readers said the same about their blogs? That’s a hugely arrogant thing to write, even if true, keep it private.

  70. I agree with Carri that music drives me crazy. Especially when the player is buried somewhere on the page and I can’t figure out how to turn it off or pause it. And, why does the music always have to be sad stuff?

    Another turn-off for me is trying to figure out how to leave a comment. Some blogs have the comment button at the top of the blog post next to the title and others have it at the bottom and some are completely hidden so that I have no idea how to leave a comment.

    Turn-ons: Links to other blogs or articles related to your topic. I use these to expand my reading list and enjoy “meeting” new people.

  71. Excellent! I’ve been blogging on and off for years as well (and have recently returned to the practice). I am definitely lost in the new world of blogging, and I agree with all of your points. I’m not a huge fan of my out-of-the-box WordPress design at the moment, but at least it’s simple. I hope to customize it at some point, hopefully it will get cleaner in the process (with maybe some judicious use of color so as not to be a total snooze).

    I just clicked to your site from a link on BlogHer, I’m looking forward to reading more of your posts!

  72. Hi again! I swear I’m not a blog stalker, I just love reading your writing! 🙂

    Anyway, after discovering this post, I immediately went over to my blog and turned off word verification. Now maybe I’ll get more comments. Unless I’m boring.

    Everything else you said I completely agree with. Thanks for sharing your tips!

    -Marie a.k.a. Murray’s Momma

Trackbacks

  1. […] weekend I decided to share with you all what my bloggy turn-on’s and turn-off’s are, and we all had a lovely conversation in the comment section about what we all think works on […]

  2. […] almost four years that I have been hanging out around here. The idea for this series came from a post that got WAY more attention than I thought I […]

  3. […] This is the final installation of the 3-part series that spun off from this post about my Bloggy Turn-ons and Turn-off’s. […]