As I write this you are playing near me. You are throwing your giant, red bouncy ball aggressively at your small, orange bouncy ball watching with delight (and much chirping) as they bounce amok off of each other. And just like that you have lost interest and are now chucking a small soccer ball against the island as hard as you can.
This is our life with an 18 month old.
I could have never dreamed that this is what my life would be like or what you would be like when you were kicking away in my tummy.
You are one of the happiest boys ever. You make everyone you meet smile–even the grumpiest of old ladies gives you a flirty grin when she sees your scrunchy little smile.
You are becoming such a little man. You can run and jump better than most 18 month-olds, but you still don’t say any words to us. While you understand everything…and I mean EVERYTHING…we tell you or ask of you, you still respond with chirps, pointing, and some sign language. And you are totally content with it.
You love to point out anything that has the “ooo” sound: moon, balloon, cows (they are “moo’s” to you). You are starting to point at letters and numbers as well and make the “uuunn” sound like you’re counting “one…”. Stacking blocks, playing with puzzles, and pushing any sort of button that results in noise are your favorite things.
You also love, LOVE, LOVE music. You could dance and play to music all day long. You always responded to music when you were “on the inside”, but I could never have imagined how much joy it would bring you on the outside. This is such a blessing for your daddy and I because we love music too! When we play Pearl Jam concerts you even clap along with the audience!
In many ways you are so much like your daddy. You are thoughtful and curious. You would rather investigate a toy fully before you play with it, even if it means destroying it. You love to know what makes things work. You also like to rough house and play outside. Your favorite toys are the things you see daddy or i use every day. Outside you love to have daddy’s golf club and ball; inside you love to empty out my baking utensils.
You are also very much like me. You love books and cuddling up to watch TV or read. You love to be the center of attention and make everyone laugh. In fact, you are quite a little ham.
However our similarities can be problematic sometimes. You and I are both quickly frustrated when something (anything) doesn’t go our way. And that includes people doing (or not doing) what we expect of them. This causes you and I to butt heads frequently. I am doing my best to teach you how a loving adult deals with frustrated feelings, but often I fall short. I hope you can learn how to be cool-headed from your daddy. He is much better at it than I am.
However, no matter how many ringers you and I go through, we always end the day together, in the rocker in your room, peacefully rocking.
You are so very cuddley. When you are sad, hurt, tired, or just in need of a hug, I am the one you come to first. Rocking you and having you hold me tight with one arm and your lamby with the other makes my heart swell with happiness and peace.
Eddie, my arms will always be open for you. I need you to know that. No matter how hurt, tired, or scared you are, you need to know that you always have someone you can turn to. I will always, ALWAYS love you. I will always, ALWAYS have a hug for you.
You will always be my miracle. You were the “third time’s the charm” baby. You were the one who decided to stick with me and my shoddy mom body.
Even though I needed supplements to keep things nice for you in there;
even though you decided to be sunny-side up;
even though I grew you to a whopping 9.5 lbs;
even though your head is massive;
even though you had to be taken C-section;
even though you had mad colic;
even though I had mad PPD/A;
even through all the tough times, you stuck. And i stuck. And daddy stuck.
We are a family.
And you are 18 months old today.
I love you more today than yesterday or the day before. In fact, I love you to the “moooooo” and back, my Edward Bear.
And just so we never forget the joy of your smile or the love in your laugh…
“We worry what a child will become tomorrow, yet we forget that he is someone today.” ~Stacia Tauscher